


Betrayl knoweth thine name

by WolfKomoki



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: AU, F/M, Takes place during season 3, mergana - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-05
Updated: 2015-06-08
Packaged: 2018-04-03 02:02:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,141
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4082473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WolfKomoki/pseuds/WolfKomoki
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Merlin slowly grew insane with each and every person he lost.<br/>One day he says he's had enough and joins Morgana on her quest to destroy Camelot.<br/>Arthur wants to know one thing: why?<br/>Set during season 3.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Merlin is owned by bbc.  
> Inspired by my own confession:   
> Cover for this fic: [](http://tinypic.com?ref=6592py)

          Merlin grew tired of pretending to be Arthur’s loyal servant. Honestly, he didn’t know why he still continued to pretend to be his lap dog. Today was the last day, that much was certain. Merlin puts on a smile, acting like his old self. He had really gotten good at his charade as no one suspected a thing.

          “Good Morning sire! How was your night?” He exclaimed, opening the curtains to let in a little sun. He mentally scoffed at himself, honestly, this act was wearing on his nerves.

          “Merlin, why are you so cheery this morning?” Arthur complained, rolling over to block out the light.

          “Because today is going to be a good day sire!” He smiled, still acting. He stared at his reflection in the mirror. His eyes were cold underneath, and his heart was covered in darkness. Suddenly his reflection returned to his charade.

          “Merlin, fetch me some breakfast, will you?” Arthur grumbled.

          “Already done!” Merlin smiled as Arthur sat up. Arthur looked at Merlin and blinked. Merlin’s eyes were cold, and lifeless.

          “Merlin?” Arthur asked as he jumped out of the bed with genuine fear.

          “Yes Arthur?” Merlin’s eyes returned to normal.

          “Sorry I’m feeling a bit ill. May I go?” Merlin put on the charade again.

          “Yeah, sure.” Arthur muttered as Merlin left his room. Once he left, he climbed on one of the horses and rode out of Camelot. He used his magic to track down Morgana. It was just a simple spell really, one of the basics in Gaius’s books. She was just off the coast of Cenrid’s kingdom, in the mountains. He smiled as he rode there. The journey took about three days, and that’s when he traded the horse.

          Morgana saw Merlin ride up in the distance. She hid behind the tree, panicking. _Why was he here and how did he find her?_

Merlin slowly approached her, his hands in the air to show that he was unarmed.

          “Why are you here Merlin? Did you bring Arthur and his men?” She growled.

          “No, I’m alone.” His voice was cold, and lifeless. He didn’t put on the charade of being Arthur’s little clueless servant anymore. He didn’t pretend to be happy, when all he wanted was to watch Camelot burn to the ground.

Morgana stared at his eyes for the first time. Gone were the eyes of the innocent manservant that was loyal to Arthur. These eyes were cold, and calculating.

          “Merlin?” Morgana asked with confusion as he got closer. When he got closer he stood still.

          “May I sit?” He asked, waiting for her response.

          “Fine, but if you try anything…” She warned. Merlin chuckled and sat on the rocks with her.

          “Why have you come here Merlin?” Morgana questioned.

          “ **Forbærne yfel**.” Merlin cast a ring of fire around the dead tree beside them. Morgana stared in shock when she saw his eyes turn gold with the magic that flowed through him.

          “Why would you learn magic? You know that would have gotten you executed don’t you?” Morgana gasped.

          “I didn’t learn it.” Merlin admitted. It was nice not to have to worry about being executed by Arthur should he ever find out. Uther had taught the entire kingdom that magic was evil, and Arthur felt the very same.

          “I don’t understand Merlin.” Morgana was still confused.

          “I was born with it.” Merlin finally admitted.

          “Then why would you go to the one place that would have you executed?” Morgana screamed with frustration.

          “To be honest ,my mother sent me because of my magic.” Merlin told her.

          “And?” Morgana still didn’t understand.

          “And I become Arthur’s servant. I also learned that I was destined to help Arthur return magic to the land and unite the kingdoms. However, I can’t serve a king who says everyone with magic is evil. He had even said “If you had magic I’d kill you.” Merlin explained.

          “Well then why don’t you join me and watch Camelot burn to the ground?” Morgana smiled as she stood up and offered her hand. Merlin smiled and grabbed her hand, sealing the deal.

          “So Merlin, what made you decide to join me?” Morgana asked with a smile.

          “I’ve lost so many people. This girl I knew Freya that I was in love with, My father Balinor, and Lancelot. And Arthur expects me to be the happy little idiot that beckons to his every word. Well, no more!” Merlin growled.

          “He really is cruel isn’t he?” Morgana sighed.

          “That he is.” Merlin sighed. Morgause eventually joined them, pointing her sword at Merlin.

          “Whoa! Relax! I’m on _your_ side!” Merlin gasped.

          “And why would you be on our side Merlin?” Morgause laughed.

          “ **Forbærne firgenholt.** ” Merlin’s eyes turned gold as he used a simple tree splitting spell to make the tree beside them fall.

          “You have magic?” Morgause asked with shock.

          “Yes, I have magic. No, I didn’t learn it, and I was born with it. Can we move on?” Merlin sighed.

          “Well I can see why you left Camelot. Come on, we need to get to shelter by nightfall.” Morgause smiled as she and Morgana climbed on their horses.

Merlin thought of calling Kilgharrah, but then he didn’t think that he would obey. Still, he would make him obey.

          “ **O drakon, fthengomai au se kalon su katerkheo deuro!** ” Merlin roared. Morgana and Morgause backed away in surprise, having never heard the spell he was using. Suddenly the great dragon arrived, looking extremely angry.

          “ **I will not aid you in your quest Merlin!** ” Kilgharrah angrily shouted.

          “ **Ah, but you don’t have a choice in the matter do you?** ” Merlin laughed.

          “ **You are correct. I do not.** ”Kilgharrah sighed. They had been speaking in Dragon-tongue for quite some time.

          “Did you know he was a Dragonlord?” Morgause asked.

          “No, I did not.” Morgana said, genuinely shocked.

Merlin climbed onto Kilgharrah and they rode towards a village.

          “Uh where are you going to go?” Merlin asked once he dismounted.

          “There’s a cave over there. He might could fit there.” Morgana pointed right.

          “I will return.” Kilgharrah said as he flew over towards the cave. It was about three miles away.

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I used basic bird wing care for Kilgharrah in this chapter.  
> Also the healing time was estimated.

          Merlin decided to join Kilgharrah in the cave. He trusted Morgana and Morgause but he felt bad leaving Kilgharrah by himself. Merlin slowly approached the cave to realize that Kilgharrah was sleeping. Smiling, he put a large blanket over his scales that he conjured up by magic. Once he did that he set his bed next to Kilgharrah, and he lay under his wings.

          Meanwhile Morgana and Morgause were staying inside a small hut. They had fallen asleep as well. _In Merlin’s dream he was drowning. He was trapped in a bottle underwater, and couldn’t get out._

          Kilgharrah woke to hear Merlin cry out in his sleep. He gently put his wing against Merlin’s shoulder and started shaking him.

          “Merlin wake up. Merlin!” He called, still shaking him. When that didn’t work he started to tickle Merlin’s nose with his tail. Merlin’s hands moved his tail away as he slowly opened his eyes.

          “Kilgharrah? What’s the matter?” He asked, yawning.

          “You were having a nightmare.” Kilgharrah explained. Merlin yawned and curled up under his wings. Once he did that he went back to sleep.

_Morgana’s dream took place in Camelot. Merlin had just revealed his alliance to Arthur._

_“Why Merlin? What did I ever do to you for you to betray me like this?” He screamed, in tears. The rest was utter nonsense._

The next morning Morgause and Morgana were the first to stir. Kilgharrah started to move when he noticed Merlin still sleeping.

          “Merlin, time to wake up.” He gently tickled his cheek with his tail. Merlin woke up sneezing.

          “What was that for?” He complained as he slowly stood up. Kilgharrah got to his feet and Merlin climbed on. Morgana and Morgause had gotten new horses. So the journey continued.

          “The horses are getting tired.” Merlin muttered.

          “You can stay on the outskirts. Hardly anyone goes there. We’re going to go find a cave.” Merlin told them as he flew off. Morgana and Morgause got set up as they ate some food they brought with them. Merlin found a cave about six miles out and he flew in. Once they were in they ate some food and headed to bed.

          The next morning everyone was awake so after trading horses Morgana and Morgause continued to ride. It wouldn’t be much longer to Camelot now. Memories ran through Merlin’s head. Freya’s death was hard on him. So was Balinor. After Lancelot he was losing it. Merlin snapped when Arthur said all magic was evil.

          “Merlin you’re awfully quiet this morning.” Morgana commented.

          “Ah, I’m still waking up. Sorry about that.” Merlin lied. They were about six days from Camelot. With Kilgharrah’s wings Merlin would be there a lot sooner, but he didn’t think that was fair.

          “Well, Merlin, how are you feeling? In six days time we’ll be there.” Morgause asked. Merlin’s eyes flashed gold as he willed his magic to let him see what Arthur was up to.

_“Where the hell is Merlin? He’s been gone three bloody days!” Arthur screamed._

Merlin turned off the spell and chuckled. _Oh, you’ll see me soon enough._

          “Merlin, we should stop here for the night, it’s getting cold.” Morgana told him as they each huddled into the cave. There weren’t any huts nearby so this was the only option. Kilgharrah blew his fire onto the campfire they made, and they each went to sleep with Merlin under his wings.

Morgana and Morgause huddled against the wall until they fell asleep. The next morning Merlin had been gone four days. They slowly woke and continued their journey once the horses for Morgana and Morgause were switched. Once they did that, they continued the journey until nightfall.

It was getting colder as winter was just around the corner.

          They stayed in a cave again as there weren’t any huts nearby.

          Kilgharrah limped into the cave, as his right wing was injured.

          “You’re bleeding. How long have you been like this?” Merlin asked the dragon. He brought out some bottled water, and made it lukewarm via magic.

He then poured it on a cloth and dabbed the wound gently, so as not to hurt him.

          Merlin was silent as he continued to work. He cut a long strip of gauze he had in his bag, long enough to cover the wing. He grabbed the wing and held it in its natural position as he wrapped his body. Kilgharrah cried out in pain.

          “Sorry, I know it hurts.” Merlin apologized as he continued to work. He wrapped it around the broken wing, and under the functional wing. Now his wing could heal.

          “What am I going to do now? I can’t leave him like this.” Merlin cried.

          “I suppose we can wait. How long will it take to heal?” Morgana asked.

          “Well on a bird it could take months, but on a dragon? I’d estimate at least six months to a year.” Merlin sighed.

          “Is there nothing else you can do?”Morgana asked.

          “I’m afraid my knowledge is limited.” Merlin sighed.

          “Well, we can stay in this cave until then. We’ll gather food, and supplies for our journey whilst we’re out as well.” Morgause told him.

          “Thank you.” Merlin smiled as they rested for the night. Merlin continued to tend to Kilgharrah’s wing, checking for movement each night. Sadly, three months passed by and still it didn’t move. Merlin collapsed to his knees and curled into a ball.

          “Merlin, it is alright. Do not cry.” Kilgharrah tried to comfort him.

          “No Kilgharrah. You’re not healing as well as you could be because I can’t treat you properly!” Merlin sobbed. Kilgharrah pulled him closer with his tail, in an effort to comfort him.

Six months passed since then and Kilgharrah’s wing’s cut had faded away.

          “Can you move it?” Merlin asked with concern. Kilgharrah flapped his wings and Merlin cheered.

          “Okay, now try flying about a mile. If you can handle it, we’ll try with me on your back, but only if you’re feeling up to it.” Merlin exclaimed. Kilgharrah was able to fly a short distance, but he was clearly struggling.

          “ **Okay, stop! That’s enough!** ” He spoke to him telepathically. Kilgharrah nodded and flew back into the cave.

          “Hey, he flew a short distance! That’s good... right?” Morgana exclaimed.

                   “It’s certainly an improvement but he still can’t travel.” Merlin sighed. Kilgharrah pulled him closer with his tail.

          “Hey!” Merlin called as he wrapped his wings around his master.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By bottled water I mean water in a glass bottle.


	3. Chapter 3

          Arthur was beginning to panic at this point. Merlin has been gone for six months! He just left without a word or a letter. Was he even missing, or is he kidnapped, or—no. Merlin is alive, that much he was certain.

          Merlin used the spell to view Camelot again. It was touching to see Arthur still looking for him. Uther was looking for Morgana.

Kilgharrah had gotten better at flying. He could fly for one mile now without limping to the ground. Merlin had turned off the spell and smiled when he watched Kilgharrah fly.

          One year had passed since then and Kilgharrah was finally healed. Finally, it was time to move. Arthur had gotten a replacement servant, as he believed Merlin to be dead. He hated to even think it, but he had been missing for a year.

          “The time to move is now.” Merlin told them as he climbed onto Kilgharrah. Morgause and Morgana’s horses were well rested so they rode towards Camelot. In three days they were finally there.

          “Morgana, you go to Uther and pretend to be kidnapped. I’ll go to Arthur and do the same. Morgause, um…” Merlin didn’t think his plan through.

          “I’ll disguise myself as a maidservant.”She smiled as she magically changed her clothes to look like that of a maidservant’s.

And with that they split up. Merlin used his magic to make himself look like he had been beaten, and chained. He looked into the mirror and used his magic to make himself appear to be afraid and in pain no matter what.

This way should he slip up Arthur won’t suspect him.

          Morgana ran into Uther’s chambers, putting on the same charade as Merlin.

          “Morgana!” Uther gasped as she collapsed into his arms, looking visibly afraid and in pain thanks to the spell Merlin had taught her.

          “Morgana it’s okay, you’re safe now!” He pleaded. He looked at her injuries. She had clearly been beaten, and chained.

          “Morgana, who did this to you?” Uther demanded.

          “I don’t know! I barely escaped with my life. I’d been trapped for a year!” She put up the charade.

          Meanwhile, Merlin ran into Arthur’s chambers, pulling the same charade.

          “Merlin! Where have you been? I thought you were dead!” He gasped as he collapsed into his arms, visibly afraid.

          “Merlin, it’s okay, you’re safe now!” Arthur told him, trying to calm him. It was then that he noticed his injuries. Merlin had clearly been chained, and beaten.

          “Who did this to you?” Arthur asked, still comforting Merlin.

          “How should I know? I’ve been trapped underground for a year!” Merlin puts up the charade.

          “How stupid of me! Of course, of course! I’ll let you rest.” Arthur said as he helped Merlin to his chambers.

          “I can handle it from here sire.” Merlin told him.

          “Don’t be ridiculous Merlin. I’ll help you lie still and then I’ll fetch Gaius.” Arthur said as he picked him up and placed him on the bed. Once Arthur left Merlin made sure the spell continued until the wounds were healed. Morgana had already been healed from the spell so she went to meet up with Morgause.

          Gaius tended to Merlin’s head wounds first, as his burns would take time to heal. Once the head wound was treated Gaius wrapped it up and retired for the evening in his chambers. Once Gaius was gone Merlin broke the spell and met up with Morgana.

          “How was the little meeting with Arthur?” Morgana asked, running her fingers through Merlin’s hair.

          “It was fine. He still thinks of me as the loyal, idiotic servant.” Merlin told her.

          “Uther also believes that I’m his loyal ward.” Morgana smiled.

          “And I have managed to gain a placement in the castle as a maidservant to the king.” Morgause smiled.

          “Then our plan is in action.” Morgana smiled. With that, they returned to their charades until Friday evening. Merlin had switched to a dark green robe with a hood. Gone were his servant rags and his charade.

          “Halt.” Merlin felt Arthur’s sword in his back.

          “Show yourself.” Arthur barked. He was frightened when he saw Merlin’s face. It was cold, lifeless, and Calculating.

          “Merlin?” He gasped with concern.

          “Hello dear brother.” Morgana smiled, joining Merlin.

          “Hello Arthur.” Morgause smiled.

          “No, No! Why Merlin? _Why_ would you ever join her? You’ve betrayed me!” Arthur shrieked.

          “Why? Hmm, let’s see. I’ve lost Freya, the girl I loved that _you_ killed, my _father_ Balinor when I’d only just met him, and Lancelot!” Merlin screamed.

          “Balinor was your father? Then that would make you a Dragonlord!” Arthur shrieked.

          “Yes, I’m a Dragonlord. I always have been and you said that all users of magic are evil.” Merlin laughed.

          “Merlin I still don’t understand why you’d join her.” Arthur growled.

          “ **Dark one I summon you. I command you to burn this land.** ” Merlin’s eyes turned into a fire color as blue fire came to his hand.

          “Sorceror! You’ve betrayed me! Why would you learn magic?” Arthur screamed to which Merlin let out a dark laugh.

          “You think I’d _choose_ to learn magic? I had no choice in the matter! I was born with it!” Merlin screamed.

          “I’m no sorcerer. I’m a Dragonlord. _The_ last Dragonlord in fact!” Merlin growled as he lifted a sword off the ground. Arthur froze with genuine fear for the first time in his life.

          “Merlin? I’m so so so sorry about the things I’ve done. You’ve lost so many people Merlin, and I can’t even begin to comprehend that. This isn’t _you_ Merlin. The Merlin I know wasn’t mad with power.” Arthur tried to get through to him as he was currently pointing the sword at his throat.

          “You never knew me at all Arthur.” Merlin growled, still pressing the sword to his throat.

          “Merlin, vengeance won’t bring them back.” Arthur said, still trying to get through to him.

          “SHUT UP!”Merlin screamed, using his magic to throw Arthur into a wall.

          “Merlin no—“ Merlin walked over to him as he grabbed the sword, and used it to slash Arthur’s throat. Merlin manically laughed as he watched the life fade from Arthur’s body.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man oh man! I hated writing that ending! Merlin why. *Sobs*  
> *A-hem* Anyway hope you enjoyed my take of an Insane, mad with power Merlin.  
> Looking back on this story I feel that it was super rushed but as I wasn't planning on making it a lot of chapters that's actually a good thing.  
> Questions:  
> 1\. Why didn't Arthur fight Merlin?  
> Even though Merlin was mad with power and betrayed Arthur, I don't think Arthur could bring himself to killing Merlin.  
> 2\. Why did you make it so easy for Merlin to kill Arthur?  
> Well would you be able to function after a blow to the head?  
> I think not.  
> 3\. Where were the knights?  
> They....um....fudge. I really didn't flesh that bit out very well did I?  
> Well time for another chapter.  
> 4\. What does the title say?  
> Well the title is old English for "Betrayl knows your name."


	4. Chapter 4

The knights were fighting off some of Morgana’s minions. Eventually they defeated enough of them to warrant moving on. They continued to run until they found Arthur lying motionless on the ground, with his throat that had obviously been slashed.

          “NO!” Leon screamed as he, and some other knights approached Merlin, Morgana, and Morgause.

          “Merlin what the _hell_ have you done?” One of the knights screamed.

          “This is _treason_! He _killed_ The prince of Camelot!” Another knight screamed. Merlin’s eyes flashed gold as he very coldly cast a spell.

          “ **Forbærne yfel** **.”** He cast a ring of fire around the knights as they screamed. Morgana smiled as with no knights would leave the kingdom vulnerable. Uther could smell fire coming from outside. Without a second thought, he sounded the alarms as the fire continued to spread.

          “Merlin please stop this!” Percival begged. He had been late in meeting the knights so he wasn’t caught in the flames. Merlin screamed with anger in response to that as the fire surrounding the knights left from circling them and instead the fire bounced off the walls of the castle and back to Merlin’s hand again. More of Arthur’s knights arrived in time to see Arthur’s current state.

          “NO!” They gasped as two of the knights charged at Merlin with grief induced rage. Morgause used a spell to send ice shards at them, and Morgana tried to hit them with a sleeping spell. Merlin was much faster in grabbing one of the knight’s swords.

          “Please don’t kill—“ was his last words as Merlin stabbed him clean through. Merlin stared at the blood that covered both of his arms.

          “Let that be a warning! All who dare oppose me will be killed! No amount of begging will convince me to spare you, so don’t even try!” Merlin screamed. After that, he disappeared to go wash the blood of his enemies off of his body.

          “What have you done to him? What did you enchant him with?” Percival snapped at Morgana. Morgana scoffed. Were they really so clueless?

          “Merlin came here of free will. I haven’t enchanted him.” She laughed.

          “Then you’re going to fix his memories, _now_.” Percival growled.

          “You _really_ don’t get it do you?” Morgana growled.

          “Merlin came to me of free will because the people in Camelot made his life a living hell. Does that summon it up for you?” Morgana sighed. Percival ran towards Morgana with a sword only to be thrown backwards by Merlin.

Percival’s head smacked against the tree as Merlin used his magic to send him flying.

          The other knights ran at both Morgana and Merlin. One of them managed to stab Merlin in the leg, to which Merlin screamed.

          “Merlin!” Morgana gasped as her eyes turned to a fiery gold color. She was now angry that they had managed to hurt her partner, and with that she caused the trees to catch on fire. Percival started choking against the smoke as he slowly got up, and he got away from the fire as fast as he could.

Morgause used a healing spell on Merlin’s leg, and that was when Morgana killed one of the knights.

          “Mer…lin…” Percival gasped, slowly crawling over to him. Merlin looked at him with anger as his eyes flashed gold.

          “ _Don’t… move!”_ He growled.

          “Merlin… please. Just stop. Arthur wouldn’t want this, and you know Gaius wouldn’t.” Percival begged, trying to get through to him.

Merlin sighed and picked Percival up, disappearing as he teleported inside the castle.

          “What are you doing?” Percival gasped.

          “Shh… don’t try to talk. I’m taking you somewhere safe.” He told him. The two people he didn’t want to die were Gaius, and Percival.

          “…” Percival nodded as Merlin took him towards Kilgharrah and placed him on his back.

          “Take him somewhere safe far away from here.” Merlin ordered. He teleported into Gaius’s chambers next.

          “Merlin!” Gaius gasped as he looked into his eyes. His eyes were cold, and demented.

          “Merlin what have you done?” He gasped as Merlin grabbed his arm. He teleported away from Camelot until he found Kilgharrah.

          “You want me to take him to safety as well Merlin?” Kilgharrah asked.

          “Yes.” And with that Merlin put Gaius on his back as he took him to safety. Once the two people he cared about were out of danger of being killed, he teleported back to Camelot. Once there he took in his surroundings.

The castle was in ruins.

          Many of its citizens were dead. The entire castle had been burned down. Merlin smiled at this and began to laugh maniacally. This was what he dreamed of ever since he lost so many people. Morgana and Morgause smiled at their accomplishment and that was when Merlin called Kilgharrah.

          “Are you ready to move on?” He asked, frowning at what Merlin had become. He had wanted this, but for this to be Merlin’s doing saddened his heart. Merlin nodded as he got onto Kilgharrah. Morgana and Morgause followed Merlin as he lead the way. Merlin had found an abandoned kingdom near Ealdor and that was where he was going to stay.

          Percival and Gaius were frightened of Merlin. Seeing his insanity was something they never thought they’d see, yet here it was for all to see.

Gaius had tended to Percival while they were away.

          “Merlin, can I ask you something?” Percival asked. Merlin’s eyes were calm, and that was frightening to him.

          “Yes Percival?” Merlin asked. He frowned as he thought of everything that he had done. He had thought that this was what he wanted, but now that he really thought about it? He didn’t want this. Merlin was angry and in that anger he completely snapped. He stared at his reflection in the mirror that was left in this castle.

          His eyes were cold, and demented. His hands were covered in blood from what he had done. Merlin slowly stood from his chair and went down to Freya’s lake with a sigh. A tear slipped from his eyes as he realized just how much of a monster he had become.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And this is the conclusion! Let me know what you think!  
> Did you like Merlin's decision?

**Author's Note:**

> What do you think? I don't think I did Morgause's character justice.  
> Also this is unbeta'd if you spot any mistakes please let me know!


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